Author Archives: Mr Bashful

Key 20. Ask your unwanted thoughts to leave.

‘Write kindness in marble; your injuries in dust.’ 
 Persian proverb. Q. ‘I often find myself thinking negative thoughts. What can I do to stop having them?’ Applying the keys in this book will, over time, prompt you to have fewer … Continue reading

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Part 5. Be angry.

Anger is an invaluable emotion to have. It helps subjugated people revolt, it gave women the vote, it can help you stick up for yourself when you are bullied. It can energise us. It’s a good motivator for when change … Continue reading

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Key 21. Be angry with yourself.

Let’s not confuse anger with self-blame and harsh self-criticism. Anger is a wonderful emotion to have provided we express it in a healthy, constructive manner. So, the next time you are angry with yourself, go ahead: be angry, but ensure … Continue reading

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Being angry with no-one in particular.

‘How do we deal with our anger when no one is at fault? Or if we can’t complain to the person who is at fault? Or if the incident is long gone, but the anger remains?’ It’s awkward. I injured … Continue reading

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I feel angry with someone. What do I do?

Q. ‘I feel angry with someone and will be speaking with them tomorrow about it. What do I do?’
 1. Be aware of exactly what you want to happen. Ask yourself, ‘What is my goal?’ 

2. Don’t exaggerate. For example, don’t … Continue reading

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If an incident occurs and I am immediately angry . . .

Q. ‘If an incident occurs and I am immediately angry. What can I do?’

 My answer can’t take into account the countless permutations of all the possible situations. Use the steps below as a rough guide. In the heat of … Continue reading

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Is the Dalai Lama an anger avoider?

Mark, You said that people who don’t allow themselves to become angry are anger-avoiders. Is the Dalai Lama is an anger-avoider? To find out, I wrote to three teachers of Buddhism. All replied. Apparently, Buddhists don’t repress or avoid anger, … Continue reading

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