Key 36. Look for the parts you can change.

The two previous keys are about acknowledging the parts we play when things go wrong and right.

Looking for the parts we play when things go wrong helps us become adept at anticipating problems, and solving them. We get the same benefit when we look for what we did right, plus a confidence booster.

Both add to our inner authority, but even if our life is already running smoothly we can tweak the good life we have even further, by looking for the parts in our life we can change.

‘Examine every aspect of your life and ask yourself, “What am I really choosing here, and can I really expect that choice to bring me lasting happiness?” You might be surprised what you uncover.’

Domonique Bertolucci, in his book, The Happiness Code.

Let’s look for aspects in our life that could do with a ‘grease and oil’ change. For example:

* Could your relationship with your partner be improved? (It doesn’t have to be a big thing. Start with a tiny thing. For example, saying ‘please’ more often.)

* Is there a way you could strengthen the relationship you have with your children?

* Is there a better way you could use your commuting time?

* Can you improve the relationship you have with that jerk at work? (For example, you could stop thinking of him as a jerk.)

* Can you find a more efficient way to get a job done?

* Will improving your public speaking skills increase your ability to give presentations at work, or speak at your daughter’s wedding? Will it improve your confidence in general?

Actively and dynamically take the initiative. Drive your life.

Exercise:

Step 1. Make a list of the niggling problems and complaints in your life.

Step 2. For each item ask yourself, ‘What could I do to improve the situation?’

Brainstorm possible solutions. Be adventurous in your thoughts. When you have finished, pick out the good solutions and apply them.

When you get good at ‘tweaking’ your life you understand the power you have in living your life.

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